What doesn't kill you makes you stronger

I dont mean to push you and i'm sorry if i did..
and if you're reading this, i just want to tell you how much you mean to me..

but life is harsh.. and life is tough..and i hope you understand why i did the things i did..i was upset, dissapointed, frustrated, yet grateful at the same time.. it was depression.. it was anger. but i remember a quote once not so long time ago..

You cannot be both angry and grateful at the same time. Start counting the blessings and miracles in your life, start looking for them and you shall find more.

There is a lesson to be learned from every situation. No matter how unfortunate the situation may appear, recognize the beautiful lessons waiting to be discovered. Sometimes lessons are expensive, but every problem is a learning opportunity in disguise. You may have made a mistake, but now you can accept it and continue, knowing that you will make a different decision in the future.

Everyone made a mistake. We stumbled, we fall, and we got up on our own two feet again.. and thats how the cycle continues.. its easy to laugh and look at anything from a lighter view when it doesnt happen on you. but when the joke's on you,what have you got to say? what options have you got to choose..

Life goes one.. what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.. unless it kills you, then you're in between.. its life. its death. its everything in between.

I want to be strong. I want to be someone you can count on. I want to learn and live.

Wannabe -Me!

Just came back from a trade show today.. gorgeous! gorgeous! gorgeous!!
I've just came across a super funky store with all sorts of cute, designer-like gadget that you could only imagine.. *sigh*

and how i wish..

*i could hear background music started playing dreamily across my mind.. as it travels into my very own la-la-land...*

i saw a girl.. looked rather savvy, flawless and every inch a successful, proud young business woman.. having everything under her control, her life, her business, her finance, with a nice little pink diary.. talking on an oh-so-posh Motorola flip phone, checking her oh-so-nice Gucci watch and sipping her favourite Bubble Tea.
On her right hand, is a set of keys to her oh-so-metro apartment with a to-die-for view.. and her sparkling white car.. ready to go for an important million-dollar business meeting..

She looked rather satisfied and amused, hang up the phone, and was just about to put the phone back to her oh-so-glam latest Dior bag, when her phone rang again.. this time was an sms.. from her ever oh-so-sweet boyfriend or fiance (maybe?)..she skimmed thru, smile and get into the car and drive away.. leaving only her the beautiful smell of her oh-so-chic Burberry London perfume for your imagination..


*and the curtain slowly drew closer.. and closer.. as she drove away to the sun set.. to continue her fulfilling, joyous routine...*

i wish...i wish....

I wish there i met a magician and suddenly I was in her shoes.. living her oh-so-perfect life..i wish its that easy to ditch all the problem in the life.. and just fill her shoes.. in fact, what if it really happens? what am i gonna do!?

Awesome! Awesome! Im starting to feel insane!
God.. Cant take my mind away from the dream! CANT CANT.. someone wake me up!

She likes how he blogs, her texts turn him on.

Geeez... cant believe its another month now.. its JUNE!! How time really flies.. its been half a year since the mess. and im alright.. just like ppl say, when things gets to the worst, it really cant go any worst.. thank God..

really cant believe its another 2 months since my last hesitation about him..but he's sweet.. at the very least, he makes me laugh..and cried..and live my life again :)

btw, been really keen at the new CK In2u marketing.. i think its brilliant.. though the actual smell of the perfume is rather.. usual. Found this on web:

The name is written in the shorthand of an instant message, a casual invitation to sex so immediate as to imply there was no time to spell it out: “in to you.”

She only knows his screen name, but can see that he has a cute face. He doesn't know what she looks like, but he wants to know what she's in2. She likes how he blogs, her texts turn him on.

It's intense. For right now.

thought this bit is a bit over the top ---> Last year, the company went so far as to trademark “technosexual,” anticipating it could become a buzzword for marketing to millennials, the roughly 80 million Americans born from 1982 to 1995.

...well.. lets see if thats technosexual bit is gonna happen.. repeating the success of CK One in its day. But the whole point is, it does really catch my full attention. Thumbs up, CK!

Dumb and Dumber

Been abandoning blog for quite a while.. :P
life's been a bit hectic.. bit messy, bit busy and bit fussy and confusing these days.. havent been doing the right thing. No!! it's more like doing all the wrong things all at once and happy to make things worse so i can start all over again. what an idiot!

Lesson no.1 - Office affair is not a good idea. Dont mess around
Lesson no.2 - Never make a sudden U- turn or you'll regret
Lesson no.3 - The stress of being dumped and dumping ppl at the same time equals to twice the amount of overdosing on Panadol by 10x

.....

Life isnt getting easier and really, i dont know what the sh*t i was talking about..

Sickos & Weirdos

Havent been posting for days..not because im too lazy.. just havent get online for a few days.. been out and about.. and havent slept for the past (almost)40 hours.. and living a single life to the max (something that i havent done for a few years..:P)

Not much update, anyway.. just work work and work.. but the truth is, i havent been concentrating on my listing job much these days, thanks to overload issue.. and too much things going on with complaints from some really stupid, overreacting, troublesome customers... some from fair trading.. and some.. really, just useless stuff like why have you not reply my emails and shit like that.. tiring.. boring.. frustrating.. and most of all, making ppl sick sick sick :(

Watermelon Hell

Maybe it was lack of sleep, maybe it was just stressed, plus a bit of pain.. but it certainly is a big frustration..

i totally freaked out at work yesterday :( which is so unprofessional.. but i cant help it.. im sooooo tired i cant even blog.. plus tonnes of complaints waiting to be resolved.. *sigh* what a life..

came back from office, head straight to supermarket.. and gosh, why are everyone buying watermelon like there's no tomorrow??! they are bloody heavy.. all of them.. why did every single customer have to carry at least 1 huuge XXL watermelon in their shopping bag *rolled eyes* dooh..

anyway, its been a long day, but the show must go on.. and now,time for me to log into the career site to look for new jobs.. *sigh*

More than this, baby

Still dying slowly
somehow manage hard to ease the pain away
still dancing the dance of the death
but its gotta take more than this to kill me..
to destroy my faith in myself

Empty.. the feeling i know best
woke up empty, go to bed empty
laugh and cry, talking to my soul
i feel empty inside..

I cant explain this feeling
i feel lifeless yet i dont want to die
i feel lonely yet i dont want you here
i feel empty but i feel better off alone..somehow
i feel tired but i am restless
im fighting this feeling again and again.. and i dont know how long it will take me to stand up again.. brush off the dust.. pick up whats left.. and move on.. and show you what i made of..

i dont know..

all i know is
it takes
more than this
to kill me off the chapter
and more than this
to wipe me out of the way
more than this, baby